My blog post is late but after tonight’s heartfelt conversation with Crux trainer Dan, I realize now that it was all by design. I needed to have this conversation with him to give me enough motivation to continue to push through. Enough motivation to dig deep and be as transparent as I can be in my blog. You see, I’ve always been the girl that typically doesn’t get emotional or allow myself to be vulnerable. But after tonight’s challenging workout, Dan sincerely expressed how proud he was of how far I’ve come. He recalls the very first day I stepped in the gym weeks ago. To him, I was a mom with low energy, low confidence, here to get healthy for the sake of my sons. But for me the reality was that I had truly hit rock bottom. In a matter of two years, I gave birth to two beautiful boys and sacrificed myself to be there for them 200%! There was no room to take care of myself (so I thought) and as a result I completely let myself go! I had no desire to workout at all especially if it involved being away from my boys. Looking back now, I can publicly admit that I let myself go! I thought it was all a part of the process of becoming a mom and sacrifice while raising your children.
I got emotional because when I look back I can’t believe I allowed myself to accept this unhealthy lifestyle. I actually began being okay with the weight I had gained, the low energy I felt and the unhealthy food choices I made. I figured when they get older I’d eventually find time for me. There was no kind of balance whatsoever. Today, I feel like I am a completely different person because my mindset has changed. These past few weeks have challenged me beyond my comfort zone and it was exactly what I needed. I can proudly say that I am now this high confidence, high energy wife and mom who puts herself first in order to take care of everyone else second. Rather than waiting for the perfect time to workout, I literally TAKE my 45 minutes because I owe it to myself. I’ve truly come a long way!
This may all sound familiar to other posts of mine but it’s this constant reminder you need in order to keep pushing. Many times I’ve had to fight off the temptation to slip back into old habits, but it’s the constant reminders of how far we’ve come why we cant backslide now. We’re in the homestretch with 4 weeks remaining and it’s now or never. It’s game time!